In an attempt to be more in touch with my thoughts and feelings I have started to keep a journal. the posts that come from this are ones I feel that will help to push my practice forward. I won’t post anything I am not comfortable people knowing, but respecting my openness would be appreciated.
I thought it was the right time to attempt this. But maybe not.
I am still in so much pain, and I don’t think I had fully considered this pain. I can feel it wrapped around my heart, not in a nasty way, just there, just something joined to my existence. I doubt I will ever lose this. Although, I do hope to understand it, in my own way. Perhaps through an understanding of how others describe death and grief, beginning with the draw of church the ***** feels. I then believe the Quakers would be good, as a way of understanding grandads curiosity of their reflection methods. there us also philosophy, myths and legends or other religions. I just need to carefully open the door on my grieving so that I can understand it completely as possible, eventually coming to my own conclusions.